According to the Associated Press, 22 percent of married men and 14 percent of married women have strayed at least once during their married lives. This means they have had sexual relations with someone other than their spouse. Depending on the side of the fence that you are sitting on — potential cheater or concerned spouse — there are some clear body language signs that point to adultery. As a cheater, you will want to check this behavior; as a suspicious spouse, you will find clear signs of your partner’s infidelity in these signs.
Body language is one of the first things any investigator will consider when questioning a suspect. Whether a drunk-driving checkpoint or a full-out murder investigation, a skilled interrogator will pay particular attention to three key areas; eyes, hands, and body position.

Firstly, the eyes. Although this is mostly common knowledge, the lack of eye contact often reveals a liar or cheater. This makes sense because, for our entire lives we have been told that the “eyes are the key to the soul.” As such, liars and cheaters will avert their eyes for fear of being found out. Plus, lying to someone while maintaining eye contact is extremely difficult for the non-seasoned liar. So, when asking a potential cheater about his or her infidelities, take note of their eye movement. If the potential cheater maintains eyes contact when answering a direct question about his or her behavior, it is less likely that an indiscretion (or several) has occurred. For the possible cheater, maintaining eye contact is of great importance when and if you are ever confronted by your partner. For the suspicious spouse, understand that most often than not, the answer to your suspicions can be answered through direct eye contact (or lack thereof!).

Secondly, the hands. Whether we realize it or not, most people reveal their anxiety through their hands. This can be anything from turning our palms downward and clenching our hands to fidgeting with another body part or inanimate object. The fact is, anxiety leads people to “do something” and when confronted directly, there isn’t much to do aside from fidget. Professional poker players and police investigators are well aware of this clear-giveaway. It is one reason why many professional poker players consistently play with their chips — the consistent fidgeting conceals this anxiety. If you are a suspicious spouse, take note of how your partner begins to fidget when you confront him or her about the infidelity. As a current or potential cheater, recognize your anxious behavior.

Thirdly and lastly, body position. Most people do not intend on hurting others, and cheaters are no exception. As such, cheaters will place a screen between themselves and their victims when confronted about their indiscretions. In some instances, this “screen” may be a slight offset of the body (unlikely) or the placement of a physical object between questioner and questioned (more likely). This physical item can be anything from an actual desk — bankers, lawyers, police officers use this type of screen all the time — to something as simple as a hand placed over a vulnerable body part like a neck or mouth. As a suspicious spouse, try to confront your partner straight-on instead of at moments when their back might be turned to you, like when he or she is working on dishes or under the hood of a car. As a cheater, learn to face difficult questions head-on; it’s easier said than done!

With a large percentage of married couples straying from their marriages, you may be curious and in the research phase of your adventure. If you are seriously considering an affair, you should browse the listing of the most popular dating sites and see just how many attached people share your desire for discretion and who are also looking for an affair. When you take your next step, keep the topics discussed above in mind.